You should do what you can afford *without* incurring debt.

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I have no idea. My boyfriend’s sister’s wedding cost over $30,000. It was beautiful, but that amount of money would give me a coronary. In her case, their parents had saved her whole life for it and covered everything, but still, $30,000?? I can’t imagine. I know they’re well-off, but that just staggers me. That’s a downpayment on a house!

If they think we’re paying that kind of money when we get married, boy do they have another thing coming, you know? That’s more than I make in a year.

I had a $16K wedding. When we got engaged, my parents told me that they were going to give us $5K toward the wedding. My mom and dad (who are divorced and remarried) both agreed to match eachother, so my dad and stepmom also gave us $5K. When my husband’s parents found out my parents were each pitching in $5K, they offered us $5K as well! Of course this worked out perfectly for us. We never had to ask anyone, they volunteered this themselves. We paid the rest of it (which was only $1K) and of course we paid for our own honeymoon.

We’ve all said this was a wonderful way to work things out because $5K is much more affordable to each family than having 1 family pay a huge chunk of money!

Part of the huge cost you are referring to are due to brides just wanting it all. In reality, a lot of unneeded stuff has been added to weddings since the 50s that are just plain not needed. You don’t need gifts to guests, you don’t need 4 bridemaids and groomsmen, you don’t need 3 or 4 parties, ******* money from your bridal party. Do you really need a church wedding? Formal wedding? Reception with dancing? Do you really need to have 150 guests? Do you have to have it on Saturday or could a week day serve just as well (have wedding in late afternoon and then reception in evening so that those who can’t take off work can attend one or the other)?

One of the best ways to cut costs is to limit your guest list to those who are most important. If you can get it down to 50 or so, a restaurant is a great place to have a wedding reception if they have a banquet room. They do everything, sometimes even provide the decorated cake for free as they did for my sister. They also handle cleanup.

My neighbor spent a fair amount of money fixing up his backyard and kitchen, but they held 3 weddings there over 2 years and now his niece is getting married in his backyard next week. Very friendly, not too formal and everybody will have a great time for a lot less money. They are paying a couple of their daughter’s coworkers (teachers) to heat up and serve food so that the family can focus on their guests.

I am a college student and my Fiance is a plumber with one year left to go until he gets his ticket…and we own a house together. Our wedding budget is $20,000 and we will only do it if we dont go into debt (a lot of people do). Fortunately, we made some smart decisions and we are renting out of main floor and living int he basement suite..this has allowed us to save tons of money. Along with smart financial choices we are great savers. We have always had no less then $10,000 in our bank savings but its not easy. If you cnat afford a wedding…then dont do it, never go into debt over anything (unless its a mortgage..thats good debt lol). Some people also have the help of their parents (we dont have that luck, were paying the whole thing ourself).

Ways to save money:
Cut down on the guest list
Have your wedding on a friday or sunday
Be creative.. no sit down dinner, there are appetizer weddings or dessert only weddings that are becomming more popular
Get your tier cake fake and buy sheet cakes
Do it yourself projects whenever you can
Have your ceremony and reception in the same place
eliminate alcohol, or just have beer and wine
Skip the flowers…fake ones can be really nice and centerpieces can be more creative..candles etc
Get your dress on sale or used

These are all cost-cutting proven, not opinions of how your wedding “should be”, FYI

Having your wedding in the “off-season” helps tremendously, so avoid May, June, September. Getting married on a Friday or Sunday is a great way to cut costs- I saved $5k just by moving my wedding to a Friday night. Thursdays are even cheaper.

Be sure to ask! You will never get what you don’t ask for! I asked every vendor:

1. Do you discount for my day of the week/time of year?
2. Do you discount based on my location (preferred vendor program)?
3. Can I swap anything out within my package?
(This one worked insanely well for my photographer, I traded my bridal portraits for a 2nd photographer)

REFER! Before you sign the dotted line, get in writing that you want to receive a discount for referrals given. Example: My stationer gives me $5 per referral and 5% off for every booking. It’s adding up! My photographer gives me $100 print credit for every referral, % discount for bookings.

Trade it in. If you have a business or trade skill that you could provide them, they may trade or discount. I am helping my photobooth guy get in to some parties I am planning and helping with his trade video.

Negotiate & strike a deal… The price they offer means they are making a profit. Negotiating down won’t hurt their bottom line. Ask to even out the $3200 price tag on something to “an even $3000″. Or, ask them to pay the sales tax?

Have friends and family help set up, assemble favors, tie ribbons, iron table cloths, etc. Having them set everything up can be a strain, so use your facility.

Keep the wedding smaller and more intimate.

Limit booze from a full bar to beer & wine only.

Avoid shrimp an other shellfish/seafood on your menu, they drive up the price.

I really hope this helps! Good luck!

you scrimp and save on everything to get the day you really want. Yes, wedding can cost that much, they can cost as much as you allow yourself to spend. I am going to Las Vegas for my big day (with about 30 close friends and family) and then having a large reception when I get back and you’d be surprised how much I saved.

It’s very rare that those weddings (over $25k) are paid for by the couple unless they are in their mid to late 30′s. My parents paid for our wedding. They had been looking forward to hosting it my entire life and wanted a huge party. All my friends were married in their 20′s and the bride’s parents paid for them. I’ve never known anyone who foot the bill themselves. It would be very hard.

My fiance & I are both in our 30′s and had some savings to start the process with, we are also established within our careers. We purposely are having a nearly 2-year engagement so we we used our savings to make the deposits to the vendors, and are using the rest of the time to make a payment to the different vendors each month up until the wedding.

It is scary to think that we have a large budget but have still had to scale back on things we wanted for the wedding to keep the costs down.

We had a beatiful wedding for $5k. We did the ceremony and reception at the same venue, we made sure that the venue we did choose offered tables, chairs and dinnerware with the price, we used silks for corsages, bouttonieres and bouqets and we did h’ordeurves for food. We did not have a bar (less expensive and I didn’t want to do a cash bar). Also, mid afternoon ceremonies/receptions are alot cheaper especially when it comes to food costs. You really have to set an established budget and stick to it to cut costs. Look for deals everywhere you go.

Remember, you shouldn’t have to break the bank just to be married because you’ll be married at the end of the day anyway.